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Two piranha/anaconda hybrid creatures hunt down the scientist who stole their egg and a film crew; making a slasher film in the jungle.
In this sequel to Sharktopus, two Piranhacondas hunt down their stolen egg. The scientist who stole the egg hitchikes the island and meets up with a movie crew on-set of filming. The star, the scientist, and some crew-members get kidnapped by some money-craving people who put them on ransom for some dough. Meanwhile, a Piranhaconda roams the island, along the way eating an island-goer, and some scientists searching for a rare flower. The snake comes to the kidnappers' hideout and attacks. The crew and the scientist escape. The lead kidnapper finds a camera and realizes that the scientist stole the egg, which caused the snake to attack, and he decides to kill the snake, and the crew. The snake follows the crew, who are in a truck, but is wounded by a grenade. The second Piranhaconda arrives and, sensing blood, attacks its wounded mate. It then decides to track down the crew. The scientist reveals that he had the egg, so they try to escape via boat. But the Piranhaconda stalls their plans. The scientist pretends to get rid of the egg, but doesn't, causing the creature to follow them. The crew become trapped by the kidnappers, but the Piranhaconda crashes the party and eats the ransomers. The scientist and two crew members get back to the boat, but the man stays on shore to destroy the snake. In the water, the girl realizes that the scientist had the egg all along. She throws it in the river and shoves him overboard. He is then killed by the Piranhaconda. The girl goes back to shore and finds the boy. They lure the Piranhaconda to a waterfall using the egg. Jack slips a bomb into the case and threw it at the beast, then he and the girl jumped into the river below. The bomb went off and decapitated the snake. The two then decide to go on a date. They kiss as a third Piranhaconda devours them both. The camera switches to a shot of the waterfall, and the growl of the Piranhaconda is heard.
"Piranhaconda", well the name of the movie is a clear enough indication of what kind of movie and type of entertainment you are in for here; low-budget monster movie with a cheesy story, and probably even more cheesy monster. Well, as this is a SyFy Channel movie, then yes and yes.<br/><br/>The movie starts out wonderfully with a themesong about the piranhacondas. Yes, a song about these wonderful reptilian creatures. It was as epic as the song they had in "Super Shark".<br/><br/>The story takes place in Hawaii, where an apparent freak of nature aberration between a piranha and an anaconda have taken place. How such an unholy union came about to be, we are not given any inside information or facts about. So we can only speculate. The most logical option would be genetic manipulation, but who knows? But these two, yeah not just one, but two, piranhacondas are of gargantuan size, and how they came to grow so big and sustain their diets puzzles me. So the Hawaiian people wouldn't notice a dramatic delve in population, livestock, or whatever it is that these creatures feast upon to grow so big? Again, something not to dwell on.<br/><br/>A group of amateur film makers are out in the Hawaii jungle to shoot a horror movie when they run across this aberration of nature. But they are not just up against these gargantuan snakes, they are also fighting a band of kidnappers. To spice up the story, throw a university scholar into the midst, who wants to study the piranhaconda and bring an egg back to the civilized world. Good plan, eh? Now, the people cast for "Piranhaconda" were actually doing good enough jobs with their roles, and it does seem that people were enjoying making this movie, so that was cool. The dialogue, however, was halting and forced at times, but in a movie of this caliber, that is to be expected and can be forgiven.<br/><br/>The piranhacondas themselves, well, they looked adequate and life-like most of the times, which worked in favor of the movie. There were some scenes, though, where these creatures came off as rather fake. No surprise there.<br/><br/>Another thing that was working well in favor for "Piranhaconda" was the number of casualties throughout the movie. There was a fairly high death-toll in the movie, which was nice. But it gets better, and this part of the movie I loved, whenever the piranhacondas would kill someone, they lunged at the prey (the humans) and the people would vanish in a spray of blood red misty haze. They simply just vanished in a red misty burst. That cracked me up. There were a couple of scenes where you got to see some mutilation, in the form of severed limbs. So it wasn't all bad (if you like gore).<br/><br/>Normally snakes propel themselves forward by slithering, right? Well yeah, as did the piranhacondas, except for one time, where it was chasing after an SUV. Take a look at the creature there, it just darts forward like a straight arrow, all rank and linear. That was so funny. Never seen a snake do that before.<br/><br/>The kidnappers in "Piranhaconda" apparently all attended the "College For Goons Shooting Badly". They were shooting at the protagonists, and fired several dozens, if not hundreds of bullets, and not a single bullet struck or penetrated the vehicle. That was pretty good shooting right there, especially as it was a fairly short distance.<br/><br/>Another of these goofs, were as they headed to the dock to sail away in a small boat, the professor (played by Michael Madsen) had the jar with the piranhaconda eggs in it. Prior throughout all the movie, the eggs was submerged in some kind of fluorescent green slime, but at the docks, there was no slime in the jar. Then a little later on as they had left the docks, the jar was out again, only this time the green slime was back.<br/><br/>Another lovely goof was when the stuntman (one of the protagonists, played by Rib Hillis) was out in the jungle, he just happened to come across a blue quad-bike that conveniently had been left unattended and ready to drive in the middle of the Hawaiian jungle. That never happens where I live.<br/><br/>Despite these flaws and cheesy things, then "Piranhaconda" was actually fun entertainment. You know exactly what you are in for with these kind of SyFy monster movies. They are like traffic accidents, you know you shouldn't look, but you just can't help it. The story was campy and cheesy, which makes it fun to watch, and the creatures were so over the top that it just becomes plain fun.<br/><br/>The ending of the movie was really great actually, so hooray for SyFy for that one! Didn't see that coming actually, so it was a nice surprise.<br/><br/>When you're in Hawaii look behind you, 'coz that's where the piranhaconda's gonna be…
Piranhaconda (2012) <br/><br/>** (out of 4) <br/><br/>Creature feature fun from director Jim Wynorski takes place in Hawaii as a professor (Michael Madsen) tracks down an egg that belongs to a legendary part piranha, part anaconda creature. Soon its parents are killing anyone who gets in their way and that includes a low-budget film crew there filming a slasher pic. PIRANHACONDA is actually a step above most of the creature features that appear on SyFy and a big credit has to go to Wynorski. I've always enjoyed his film and this one here is a decent little affair that should at least keep fans of monster movies entertained. Again, this isn't Shakespeare but for the most part it delivers the goods. The CGI snake/fish creature is certainly something to see. Yes, it's looks incredibly fake but this here actually adds a little charm to the picture. The majority of the death scenes have cheap CGI blood flowing but this too had its own level of charm. A few weeks ago I watched POPATOPOLIS, a documentary on Wynorski as he attempted to make a film in three days. It was a very good documentary because we got to see him directing and just listening to him talk to his actors in a manner that some might not like. There's a director in this film that acts the same way and you can't help it was spoofing Wynorski and it's actually pretty funny. However, having seen that documentary, I do wonder if the same techniques works with Madsen. As for Madsen, he's clearly just picking up a paycheck here and he appears bored throughout the picture. The supporting cast features some pretty good performances including Teri Ivens, Shandi Finnessey, Rachel Hunter and Rib Hillis all turning in fine work. If you're looking for high art then you're obviously in the wrong place but PIRANHACONDA at least features some good moments, although it does start to wear thin towards the end.
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